LIFE AFTER SEVENTY

February 16, 2024

Life after seventy

So, big changes begin when someone turns seventy. It’s not like being a septuagenarian is, in and of itself, a crisis, but you may start thinking differently and your body may start feeling differently. You are entering the period that developmental psychologist Eric Erikson calls “integrity vs despair,’ or as he describes it “a retrospective accounting of one’s life to date; how much one embraces life as having been well lived, as opposed to regretting missed opportunities. . .” What’s more:

Those in late adulthood need to achieve both the acceptance of their life and the inevitability of their death (Barker, 2016). This stage includes finding meaning in one’s life and accepting one’s accomplishments, but also acknowledging what in life has not gone as hoped. It is also feeling a sense of contentment and accepting others’ deficiencies, including those of their parents. This acceptance will lead to integrity, but if elders are unable to achieve this acceptance, they may experience despair. Bitterness and resentments in relationships and life events can lead one to despair at the end of life. According to Erikson (1982), successful completion of this stage leads to wisdom in late life.”

I like the feature photo, because it portrays someone in some becalmed water slipping silently forward towards their destination, perhaps even their destiny. Earlier in life, I worked multiple, stressful jobs where a jet ski or motorboat might have more accurately represented my life than a skiff or canoe. Other times, I was tossed about as one cast adrift on stormy seas in a ketch or yawl. It’s hard to take your bearings and stay the course on five hours of sleep a night month after month, and year after year, often driving a daily commute of a hundred miles or more one way while skipping meals and raising a family in the process.

Nor do I attempt to “steer” my life anymore to any great degree. Deena and I have the leisure to see where the wind takes us. We have choices and we certainly have fewer responsibilities than in the past. Personally, I depend more and more on the hand of God to lead me. For example:

I have moderate stenosis (narrowing) in all three of my cardiac arteries as well as my brachial and subclavian arteries and my aorta, itself. This is a recipe for disaster, but a disaster for another day, as there is currently no blockage large enough to cause symptoms, yet alone a code me out in an ER. Yesterday, on the advice of my cardiologist, I met with a Doctor of Pharmacy who processed and prepared me for Ozempic, one of the new weight loss drugs which promises to bring my weight down by forty pounds. That would be a plus if and when I need future surgery for cancer or heart disease. But it probably means “good-bye chips.” I had no leading in my spirit and no opinion as far as taking starting the drug one way or the other, and I would not have been terribly disappointed if I was not approved. This is because this drug can be a battle to get insurance to cover it. But it went through in a matter of hours and shortly I’ll be giving myself a shot once a week.

Back to the feature photo. It doesn’t matter what skills a Captain has in terms of piloting his vessel. When he or she reaches a port, the Captain or designated helmsman steps aside and allows a harbor pilot to take control of the ship as it slips into its berth. The pilot is inimately familiar with the harbor. The same is true with nuclear submarines and aircraft carriers. Absent a pilot, hidden sandbars, dangerous shoals, treacherous currents and other features can rip a ship apart. So when a vessel approaches a port, the helmsman yields to a more competent authority.

As Erikson describes, I am content with my modest accomplishments. They include a career as a noncomissioned officer in the military where I was introduced to health care, as well as a second career teaching political science at a small, public college in Texas. Do I have regrets or things I might have done differently. The answer is emphatically “Yes!” But, I’ve come to terms with these shortcomings as have those that might have been disappointed in me. Now more than ever I see each day as precious and I’m determined not to squander them.

I’ve found early on as a Christian that God is quite willing to take an active part in your life if you invite Him to. Many are fearful that were they to do so, they might wind up in rural Indonesia as a missionary. Or they would have to sell all they had and stand on a street corner with some goofy sign for the rest of their lives. Or, they might be called to be a monk or nun. But God has helped me with everything from career choices to more tangible benefits. For example, after graduating from college, the logical graduate program for me woulf have been in education, since I was teaching at the time. But I felt “pulled” to switch to political science instead. Have I completed the degree in education, I would not have had the many teaching opportunities that I did with a degree in government and a minor in history instead. Even my physicians are now part of this divine play, ordering lab work on a “hunch” that reveals a certain health issue brewing in me that neither they nor I could predict. One light goes out and another shortly appears. A door closes as another one opens.

I can picture myself in the photo trusting the helmsman, while enjoying the scenery. It’s like being a child in a car at night as your parents return home from a trip. You trust them, and you can let your guard down without fear of disaster. Sure, some cars crash, but most don’t. But you enjoy a feeling that you are truly blessed in those circumstances, as I feel so with Deena and my new life in upstate New York.

Cybernetics

Cybernetics is an ancient Greek term used first by Plato who saw the mind as the “pilot of the soul.” The word in Greek κυβερνήτης (kybernētēs), refers to a “steersman, governor, pilot, or rudder.” In other words, it refers to the person in the featured photo who keeps the boat on course by skillfully avoiding rapids, eddies or other hazards in the path of the boat. The steersman corrects for drift, changes in the speed of the current and so on. In essence, the steersman is at the heart of a feedback loop or mechanism, which is how the term cyberntics is used today. Likewise, the Holy Spirit can guide a child of God through an uncertain and potentially dangerous terrain by applying gentle nudges, tweaks in your spirit, intuitive glimpses of what lies ahead, the wise counsel of Scripture and fellow believers, perhaps even through dreams to guide us as we steer. Often times, we unfortunately disregard the spiritual prompts, as when we have “new car fever,” simmering anger, or the urge to make life miserable for those who have made life miserable for us.

Aristotle also uses κυβερνήτης (cybernetics) in the sense of a helmsman steering a ship, and he focuses on the integration of the environment to the steersman, which takes us a step closer to the current application of the word. Aristotle mentions motions. The ship is moving in one direction, but the people on the ship are moving in different directions independently of the ships momentum. Yet, deck officers keep the ships crew in some sort of discipline and in harmony to the requirements of the ship, whether lowering or raising a sail, or deploying some other accoutrement to keep underway. Aristotle says there is continual motion all around us, “for all the ‘things divine,’ moon, sun, the planets, and the whole heavens, are in perpetual movement.” Johannes Kepler (1571-1630) picked up on this and saw a sort of “harmony of the spheres” (musica universalis), a musical relationship involving planets, comets, stars and what not. It wasn’t audible, but could be perceived by a person’s soul. Maybe this is what Tennyson’s Ulysses meant when he said “I am a part of all that I have met. . .” So, even though the steersman in the featured photo seems at peace and surrounded by serenity, there are many variables in the environment that are in motion, both under the water, above the skies and in between. By paying close attention, he is able to negotiate, integrate, even harness all of these systems.

And what of the stars

In the past, people have guided their lives by the stars. Hundreds of wagon trains crawled across North America towards the west during the nineteenth century. After unhitching the horses or oxen from the wagon each evening, every family had to be sure that the wagon tongue to which the horses or oxen were fastened pointed to Polaris, the northern pole star. When they woke up the next morning after the star had faded from sight, they knew where north was, and therefore which direction west was. This because of all the stars we can see, only Polaris does not move.

Life after seventy.  Compass.
Navigating the Stars with an Antique Compass, A Journey Through Time and Space, AI image courtesy of atdigit (Adobe.)

Certainly, sailors used the stars to navigate. Again, using Polaris which is just shy of 90 degrees or true north, steersmen could compute their latitude based on how high above the horizon Polaris was. This only worked in the northern hemisphere, however, and millions of people in the southern hemisphere live and die without ever seeing Polaris and constellation of the Little Dipper. Computing longitude was much more difficult and only came later on. I have no doubt that today, even the navigator on the huge cruise ships, or cargo vessels and oil tankers “shoot the star” in addition consulting the sophisticated GPS systems that they have. This is partly because electronic systems can fail under certain circumstances, but as long as the skies are clear, a helmsman can find his or her way.

Astrology

Deena was watching Jennifer Lopez’s new biopic the other evening, and I stayed around for a bit to watch. That sort of pop music backed with highly symbolized video is really not my cup of tea. But I was impressed with the production that I did see, and noted that there were zodiac symbols (e.g., Aries, Capricorn, Pisces, etc.) throughout as well a spoken references to these constellations. During the sixties, seventies and eighties, a popular “pick up” line or icebreaker in a lounge or bar was “What’s your sign?” Many people then and now, as well as through the centuries, ascribe certain traits to people born under certain signs. I was born in March, and qualify to be a Pisces. Pisces may be hardworking according to lore, and I can be fundamentally lazy at times, but some people build their lives around horoscopes. This is a form of divination, scientifically inaccurate since astrology doesn’t even include the correct number of planets, but the Bible takes a dim view of astrology and warns the children of God to stay clear. Take Isaiah, for example. In Isaiah 47: 13-14 he writes:

All the counsel you have received has only worn you out!
    Let your astrologers come forward,
those stargazers who make predictions month by month,
    let them save you from what is coming upon you.
 Surely they are like stubble;
    the fire will burn them up.
They cannot even save themselves
    from the power of the flame.
These are not coals for warmth;
    this is not a fire to sit by.

So, I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. That’s another day and not worth obsessing over. As the French say: “Tout ce qui sera sera sera.” My advice to those who are still tormented by the past or the present is to honor your loving spouse, get a golden retriever puppy and spend time with God.

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Retired USAF medic, college professor and C-19 Contact Tracer. Married and living in upstate New York.

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